Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
Woke up in a kilt. And it's not my kilt. Drinking was a success.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
Randomize
