i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
Watching the wiggles while tripping on acid is the scariest fucking thing of all time
You climbed out your own window and walked in the front door..
You know, I think I'm going to rock the shit out of this whole mid-twenties thing. Fuck babies and weddings -- I have vodka and young cock.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
Hey don't blame me, picking what flavor of condom to put on my dick is a very difficult selection process
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
Randomize
