whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
I just want to eat Taco Bell and throw it up on his doorstep.
I jizzed in his mayonnaise and put it back in the fridge. Shouldn't have stolen my weed.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
Randomize
