Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
she's a gynecology student. i don't know if my dick's ready for that kind of pressure.
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize
