i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
Someone came in the potted fern
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
I want you to know I am at work super hungover and I threw up in the mop sink. I feel like you will appreciate this
You're my fucking hero
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
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