what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Then my perve supervisor asked about your vagina. And I was like nunya, but its glorious
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
You told me you didn't want to go to the hospital because you were drunk, but because you didn't want to leave the "fun".
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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