So I just opened the bag you gave me and those panties aren't mine...
oh
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
I'll give her a pass for the first one, but after the second threesome, she should have learned her lesson.
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
You mean the girl who was passed out face down on the bathroom floor until 10 AM? You're right, she was cute.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
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