i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
It's getting harder and harder to fake orgasms as I get older.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
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