i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
I knew we were gonna fuck after she told me she's seen that Porno before
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
I feel a blackout coming on
Plz don't have me burst into your house saying you're late for re airport to rescue you from a fat girl again
That was 2 times
u better not lose ur virginity to a sugar daddy who doesn’t post a pic of himself to tinder
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Randomize