Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
23 Proposal Horror Stories You Won’t Believe
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
JEREMY RENNER GOT DIVORCED. I STILL HAVE A CHANCE.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
My Sexting was not on an AP level
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.