i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
Also, just grabbed a bunch of "tuxedo black" condoms. formal, anyone?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
Woaahhhh there! We are JUST drunk fucking. Don't call me "baby".
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
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