he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
You were trying to swim on the floor while eating a hot-dog bun and laughing about how much you hate bread and didn't understand why you were eating it..
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
Randomize
