This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
I've decided to dedicate my life to finding out which flavor of Gatorade tastes best after you brush your teeth
He seemed like a really nice guy. He tried to dry my shirt because someone spilled their drink on me. I think that's how I ended up topless on his dryer.
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
A+ Viking dick
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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