How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
I feel bad cuz I was his ride home, but I didn't know I was going to have a religious experience with a guy in a cookie monster t-shirt. You can't plan for that shit.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Randomize
