He is such a slut. More and more my type.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
It's situations like these that make me climb out of windows
I was mad at him...then I jerked off. Now I'm over it. Orgasms fix everything, I swear.
Randomize
