i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
We glued Jenga blocks together, called it "magic blocks" and sold it to the stoners for $50 and a bottle of Henny
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
This text constitutes a formal request for sexual congress under the terms of our Relationship Agreement.
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
