and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
Girl next to me in class just said to her friend "and I haven't even cried yet." Challenge accepted
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
If you can get her to make out with you without paying for it, I will personally make you president of the american lesbian league
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
I bought 10 disposable adhesive bras and duct tape. If Home Depot can't help my breasts defy gravity, nothing will...
LMAO
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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