Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
my being single is dangerous.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
I'm in the Wal Mart stall where we found out you weren't pregnant. This is where I'm going to propose to you. I feel like that would be the most romantic
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
That was an excessively violent trivia night
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
Randomize
