So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
So...I know we have a conversation later this week. But one of the key things I want to know is if I can specify having my body mummified and buried in Egypt (or at least nearby the Luxor in Vegas). How much money do you think that would cost? Do I need to increase my life insurance policy?
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