yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
Last time i carry you out of a forest
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
