I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
Election Day 2016 shall forever live in infamy as the day when I hobbled through my neighborhood, mascara melting down my face, wearing one slipper and a cast, blood and cum all over my skirt, carrying a box of wine, and no one even noticed.
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
Randomize