Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date. I will not get drunk on our first date.
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
