No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
don't get me wrong, i love how you're fun and free spirited. but there are some situations...like shooting down a bottle of sambuca standing in the shallow end topless surrounded by my friends
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
Dude, I think shitting blood should be a cause for concern not celebration that you had a great night.
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
Randomize
