Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
After she cried and passed out at four in the morning, I had a very lovely, very drunken conversation with her mother while decorating a cake into the shape of a penis.
Are you proud of yourself?
ask me again when I'm drunk. Then fuck off.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
video games take priority over anything else you can offer me.
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
