you turned your livingroom into a bong?
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
Apparently this establishment won't let you rent a sailboat if you have been drinking rum all morning
Like, bro, how do you think I got the idea to go sailing
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
Was last night real life? Like did you really light your hair on fire
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
Apologies that our conversations always turn to butt sex or penis size. I thought we out grew that in our 20's.
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