would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
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she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
That's unfortunate. Distance can be a stoner's greatest enemy.
You make it sound like a battle for Middle Earth.
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
This isn't fair. Why can't sober me be good at bejeweled?
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
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GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
Woke up on my sisters couch, and it was like the start of a Terminator movie,my brother in law was passed out on the floor naked in the fetal position. We now call him Arnold. It was an epic night.
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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