margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Man, I must say, having known you since preschool, Eiffel-Tower-ing her would've fully completed our journey to brotherhood.
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
Really? Uh ohh sounds like a double date with extra stripper funnnn
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
correction: my vagina hates that I'm smart.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
My fuck buddy and I talked about Amelia Bedilia for ten minutes before having sex. I think I'm in love.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Randomize
