This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
Just woke up with a blunt in each nostril and a lighter duct taped to my chest...good lookin out
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
Houston, we have a blender
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
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