If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
Dude, if that was the MLB player I think it was leaving your bedroom this morning please tell me you got his autograph. It could pay the rent for like six months.
Does puke ruin car paint? Good thing it's raining.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
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