ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Saturday morning. Went into a study room excited b/c some1 had left a paper w/ an inspirational quote: YOU ARE cApable of aChieving anything yoU waNT. Then I read the bold letters.....
So I hear you're taking over showing your penis responsibilities now that I'm gone?
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
Poorly worded request for dick pic resulted in stoned beanie selfies and "lol". Miscommunication is the devil's cock block.
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I told the cops they couldn't arrest me until they found my shoe. Now I have the grant county cops looking for my heels by the rail road tracks.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
Also, we can't be seen together looking suspicious or sexually satisfied
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
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