Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
No, seriously, 1.5 gallons of sangria plus two days of untapped cock. Waiting here. For you.
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
Being sober is boring. Tomorrow I'm def bringing wine and my vibrator to work. Might even booty call that hot guy on floor 5. Making the last week at this job legendary.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
Randomize