writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
vaguely remember the bartender stopping me outside last night so he could pull the duct tape out of my hair
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Nothing says happy gameday like waking up in only an ACC Championship shirt in the qb's bed with a different football player
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
Randomize
