Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
I went for the touchdown every play, and I think I ended up with herpes.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
Just asking. Could've given you a lap dance in a sombrero, drenched in corona and tequila.
God Bless cinco de mayo
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize
