i was like. eff you dude i'm 100% american. i went to a high school prom and i like springstein songs and i take rides in chevrolets.
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
There are eight sets of guys I've made out with who have the same name. It's like noah's ark in my mouth.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
All I know is I got on a table at late night and sang gotta go my own way
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
sarah's view on last night: a threesome to make things less awkward. oh, well done.
Randomize
