So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
He just used my bikini trimmer to give himself a fumanchu. And I still plan on having sex with him tonight. This has to be what true love feels like.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
i was so proud for not passing out at the same time as usual. i screamed that i had a "new personal best!" then some jackass explained daylight savings.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
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