yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
you were watching a documentary about sharks and wouldn't stop stroking my legs and whispering "what if they could walk?"
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
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