So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
Did you know that scruff feels epic on boobs especially when they are covered in whip cream?
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
Well, I dont really know how much penis you have at your disposal so I cant be sure
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
I might be a bit longer... I found a hot guy at the grocery store, so I'm following him and buying stuff that he's buying
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize