Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
I can't leave your house without my underwear spending the night.
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Can you find me some 'I threw up in my hair last night' medicine?
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
I literally can not watch Thor without thinking of your dick
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Randomize
