listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
respond to me or i'm telling everyone that you inserted a vodka soaked tampon into your anus
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
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