the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
He turned on read receipts specifically so i'd know he was ignoring me.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
Randomize
