There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
I don't think the people up for their 8am class were as impressed with how many beads i got last night as we were.
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i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
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How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
I'm sorry I didn't respond. I had a shit day. However, I just masturbated to Adele's Rolling In the Deep while crying. It was oddly therapeutic.
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
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