Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
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