Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
Whatever. We're stealing a penguin. Your not allowed near him... You did this to yourself.
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
Bring the cards this coming weekend. If I'm not here I died skydiving Friday
I'm not wearing underwear, I started my period this morning, and it's super windy. Recipe for disaster?
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
Not sure how ur night is going, but unless u also saw a naked drunk chick pissing outside i doubt it can top mine
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
Randomize
