His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
True but thats because hes a fetus.
if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
Why did my mother make you get naked?
Randomize