at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
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i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
The last thing I remember is feeding country fried steak to my best friend in a bubble bath with my bare hands.
Dude, Donte totally wants it. I don't have any idea how I do it. I'm not even cool. I'm not even the hero Gotham deserves. I'm barely high. My hands are swelling. Want me to pick you up anything from five guys?
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
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How I know that I'm single: when I get a save the date for a wedding & I read "& guest" my first thought was does my bottle of Jack Daniels count.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
Did you fill my inhaler with tequila?
Yeah, so?
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
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