does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
no, didnt close...
What?! she made the first move and invited you back to her place. thats like striking out in t-ball pathetic...
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
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She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
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Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
its 3am and I'm taking a bubble bath, this is what taking a day off work at 30 looks like
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
Is it weird to smoke a bong with a client from work?
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
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