C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
either fucking kiss her or kick her ass to the curb. Either way I can hear everything you are saying
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
My professor is talking about sperm and all I can think about is my mouth
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
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