Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
What a fucking waste of an outfit
Why is it that every time I type the word "give" my phone spells out HIV?! You know how many people i've told I want to HIV them something!
did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
Randomize
