Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
Can we just talk about how awesome I am. I just slept with a new guy while listening to the previous guys bands cd.
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
