i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
Dear drunk me, don't shave my balls til you're sober. My junk looks like a pomeranian with mange.
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
We don't watch enough power rangers
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
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