all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
New policy: when a woman uses the word blowjob in a sentence within 5 minutes of meeting her, you buy her a drink.
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
Congratulations, I drank so much for your birthday that I'm shitting blood.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's astonishing how many Ludacris lyrics you know
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
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